When Penny Was King

The mid-nineties were a great time. Back when Nickelodeon was still worth watching, Biggie and Pac were on top of the rap game, and Penny Hardaway was on a collision course with superstardom. He was Lebron James before Lebron James. Hardawy was a lanky 6'7 guard with a gumby cut on a Magic team that was ready to take the Eastern Conference by storm. He also had classic Nikes on the market in the midddle of an era packed with ugly sneakers. His commercials were some of the best Nike ads that have ever come out. He had Tyra Banks in many of the commercials and this is when Tyra Banks was TYRA BANKS. He earned cool points just for that. And Lil Penny was the man. He headlined Hardaway's commercials, had an opening scene for NBA on NBC for the 96 Playoffs, and was even in Blackstreet's No Digity video. Penny just flat out had the game on lock and it looked like he'd be the guy to step into an aging Michael Jordan's role as the face of the NBA. Unfortunately for us all, that never happened. Injuries brought Penny's quickly rising star to a hault. Hardaway would never get his swagger back after the surgeries. He stuck around for a while, but he just wasn't the same. Despite the unfortunate events that ended Penny's career, he will always be remembered as the kid from Memphis State who changed the game.

Die Hard

As a Knicks fan the summer of 2010 is making me more and more paranoid as it gets closer. It's supposed to be our time to regain supremacy, but I'm not so sure that will happen. I have a weird feeling that basically everyone's going to stay put and all of this fuss is going to be for nothing. That would be a heartbreak. I have been waiting three long years for this summer and if I don't get results I'd be crushed. Us Knicks fans have suffered through Isiah Thomas, Starbury, Eddy Curry, Jerome James, and a bunch of other people who we should've never even considered picking up. I'm pretty sure I wasn't the only fan who said "What the hell?" when we picked up Zach Randolph. You can't try to build your frontcourt around two fat dudes with attitudes. So we better get somebody this summer. If not me, Spike Lee, and all the other die hards will have a convention and sob together for weeks. Even though I will be extremely dissapointed if we are still at the bottom of the barrell come the start of next season, I will stay loyal. I refuse to be a bandwagon jockjumper like 70% of other "fans". Anybody can like the Lakers, but it takes some character to be a Knicks fan. So people can keep on joking now, but when we're back don't try to come along for the ride.

Posterized!!!

Thursday night’s matchup between the Miami Heat and Cleveland Cavaliers was one for the ages. It had a playoff atmosphere just two weeks into the season. With Michael Jordan sitting courtside in a tailor made suit the stage was set for two of the game’s best to put on a show. Dwayne Wade and Lebron James are the future of the NBA and they showed why on Thursday night. The showdown between the two was one of the best that I’ve seen in the regular season. They went bucket for bucket all night. One basket that probably won’t be matched by anyone all season is D-Wade’s jam over Anderson Varejao. As soon as Wade crossed half court he made a b-line for Varejao. I’m assuming that the Cavs big man was expecting to see Wade’s infamous “Euro Two Step” but that is not what he got at all. Instead he got posterized with a chest to chest tomahawk slam that will probably be the most viewed basketball clip on YouTube for the next week. What made it bad is Wade’s reaction. He immediately stepped over him, walked away, and looked at the crowd to let them know what he had just done. That dunk got me thinking. Where does that dunk rank among the best in-game “posterizations.” It had everything needed for a great dunk. There was a size mismatch. It was unexpected. He celebrated afterwards. The crowd went nuts. What more could you ask for? People get dunked on all of the time in the NBA. It’s a part of the game. But some stand out more than others. The first that comes to mind is Shawn Kemp on Alton Lister. The Reignman charged down the lane, cocked it to the side, and dropped the hammer on Lister. Adding insult to injury, when Lister fell down Kemp pointed at him while he was on the ground. I can’t even begin to imagine the embarrassment he felt. It’s always nasty when a little guy takes off on a big man. The most famous example is when Kevin Johnson of the Phoenix Suns went baseline and elevated over the seven foot Hakeem Olajuwon. Two other instances are AI’s tip slam on Marcus Camby and when Baron Davis went up on AK-47. Kobe isn't exactly little, but compared to Dwight Howard he's tiny. Which made it so surprising when he teabagged Superman. It is equally hilarious when the roles are reversed and a big guy takes advantage of a guard. When Lebron jammed on Damon Jones I felt bad for D.Jones, but it didn’t stop me from watching the replay over and over again. He set him self up for failure. Rather than getting out of the way like any logical person would, he decided to jump and take a forearm to the back of the neck. The best part about it was Jones’ reaction. He just covered his face and walked away. Priceless. I have four favorites. The first is when T-Mac sat on Shawn Bradley’s back in the 06 Playoffs. It takes a lot to get McGrady to show emotion, but that dunk definitely did that. Then you have MJ’s dunk over Pat Ewing on the baseline. You can’t talk about dunks without bringing up Vince Carter. His dunk on Alonzo Mourning was ridiculous. It felt like he was hanging in the air for an eternity. And when he jumped over that seven footer in the Olympics the whole world was in awe. I don’t know where D-Wade’s dunk is on the list, but it deserves to be in the conversation. That is a play that will be in his highlight reel twenty years from now.

Know Your Role and Shut Your Mouth

The Answer has been the subject of a lot of questions recently. Is he worth the trouble? Can he co-exist with other good players (besides in the All-Star Game)? Is he the same player that he once was? Will he ever get a ring? The answer to those questions is still unknown, but it’s starting to look like it will be a no for all four of them. On AI’s past two stops on his road to becoming a bonafide journeyman, he has openly expressed his unwillingness to come off of the bench. Teams were willing to put up with foolishness from the young, tough, lightning quick, cold blooded, thirty a night Iverson. He was irreplaceable so Philly had no choice but to put up with his crap and he knew that. Everyone has seen that infamous press conference. “We’re sitting in here, I’m supposed to be the franchise player, and we’re talking about practice. Not the game. Practice!” There are only a select few guys in the past decade who could’ve gotten away with that. But AI is not that guy anymore. He can’t do whatever he wants. He has to realize that at thirty four years old he’s not going to carry a successful team on his back. He is now in the House Party 3 stage of his career as opposed to his House Party 1 and 2 days in Philly and Denver. House Party 3 wasn’t awful, but mediocre at best compared to the first two installments which were amazing. He was spiraling toward HP3 at the end of his stay in Denver. The trade to Detroit ( which was probably one of the most lopsided trades in recent memory) pushed him over the edge. He is drifting dangerously close to House Party 4 status which will indubitably force him into retirement. Either he will accept being a role player and try to get on a championship caliber team, or both he and his ginormous ego will fade into obscurity.

There's No Crying in Basketball

There has been a catastrophic outbreak of bitch assness in the NBA over the past few years. For those of you who aren't familiar with the term, it is essentially when a person whines or throws a fit like a little girl. This is not a characteristic that would be expected in a group of six foot six grown men. Well that is not the case. In the past ten years arguing over calls has become a huge part of the game. After every call (or "missed call") there is someone in the ref's face holding their palms to the sky with a facial expression similar to that of a person who smells four day old cabbage. Players have gotten increasingly creative over the years with their reactions to what they deem to be bad calls. Some take spontaneous jogs down the court to blow off steam. Some say, "Good call ref," when they really mean, "If we weren't on national TV right now I would punch you in the face." Some even laugh. My personal favorite is the sarcastic head nod. It's the most suddle way of saying F You without getting T'd up. Why is it that no one ever thinks that they committed a foul. You get six of them. It's okay to get one. On the flip side of that, practically every time a player drives they want a foul. Basketball is meant to be a physical game. If you don't want to get hit, play golf. That's the craziest thing. Players act like they've never fouled anyone in their lives, but feel like they get hacked every time down the court. What I'm basically trying to say is that these guys need to stop all of the crying and just play ball.

We Miss You Plaxico

It is rapidly becoming more evident how important Plaxico Burress was to the New York Football Giants. First off I want to come right out and say that the Giants would have repeated as Super Bowl champs last season had it not been for Burress' legal issues. There is nothing anyone can tell me to make me believe otherwise. Plaxico was sugar to the Giants' Kool-Aid. Once he was taken out of the equation the Giants were just that. Kool-Aid with no sugar. They appeared to be the same, but were missing the most significant ingredient. Burress played the role of what I like to call a "Fetch Receiver." Eli just threw it up and he went and got it. It didn't matter if he was wide open or triple covered. He would find a way to haul it in. Having that safety valve allowed Manning to just relax and play football. Without that big target who caught everything thrown in his general direction, he has had to try and throw a perfect ball every time. In trying to throw it perfectly every time, he has overthrown quite a few receivers downfield. I believe his inaccuracy is a result of too much thought. Even when the throw has been on the money, his receivers have often let him down, dropping countless passes. In the Giants loss to the Cardinals threw two interceptions where the ball was yanked directly out of the hands of a New York receiver. The latter coming on a drive in the forth quarter inside of the two minute warning with the Giants attempting to tie the game. Not to mention that Mario Manningham had already inexplicably dropped a pass in the endzone earlier in that drive. There is no doubt in my mind that Plaxico would have went and gotten those balls. No offense to any of the New York wideouts, but Burress is simply lightyears better than them. He is bigger, more physical, and just has a nose for the ball. He is a great talent who will never play again because of a freak accident. There was a time when the G-Men may have been able to survive without Burress since the defense was so good, but they have been god awful as of late. Considering how New York has played during their current three game losing streak, I think it is safe to say that they are not even close to the team they were when Burress was in uniform.

Top 10 Two Guards in the NBA

I considered a lot of guys while forming this list. This is one of the deepest positions in the league so inevitably some excellent players were left out. One of the guys that I had a hard time leaving out was Ben Gordon. There are two words to sum up why he was even considered. Crunch Time. There is no one in the NBA who steps up in big moments like Gordon. All of the Kobe fans out there may beg to differ, but the percentages don’t lie. He has been consistently clutch throughout his career, but the 08-09 Playoffs was his coming out party. He made more big shots than Tiger Woods at the Masters. The only issue is what he does when the game isn’t on the line. Andre Iguodala is another player who is extremely gifted, but didn’t quite crack the top ten. He’s obviously talented, but there is something missing. On top of that with a shoot first point guard in Louis Williams and a healthy Elton Brand there may be a power struggle for shot attempts on the Sixers. An unsatisfied player is usually an unproductive player. Many other good players were left out, but I’m satisfied with the ten I decided to go with. These guys may not have the best skills or the best numbers, but they are the best nonetheless.

10.) Kevin Martin
Kevin Martin doesn’t get a lot of love because he doesn’t play in a big market. It doesn’t help that his team has been consistently awful since the departure of Chris Webber either. Martin is the only thing that Kings fans have had to look forward to on the way to the arena. He has been a twenty a night guy over the past three years. The only thing holding him back is the fact that he can’t stay off of the training table. If he stays healthy he has the potential to lead the league in scoring some day.
9.) Jamal Crawford
Most people look at Jamal Crawford as a playground baller, but there is a lot more substance to his game than that. They think he’s all about the oohs and ahhs. While he is capable of making defenders look sillier than Mark Madsen in the Lakers championship parade he has great court vision and a smooth jump shot. He showed glimpses of what he could do while starting in the backcourt for my beloved Knicks. He’s a little inconsistent, but when he is on, he is virtually unguardable.
8.) Tracy McGrady
Tracy McGrady is one of the most versatile players in the NBA. The guy is a beast. There isn’t much else to say. He would be even higher on the list if he didn’t take an extended vacation on the bench in his street clothes every year.
7.) Ray Allen & Michael Redd
This one may be a bit of a cop-out. I was torn between two guys so I decided to just group them. It’s kind of appropriate because both of these players have made millions of dollars doing the same thing. Catching the ball and letting it fly. Ray Allen and Michael Redd are possibly the best riflemen in the NBA. Off the dribble, fading away, contested, off of a screen, from out of bounds, eyes closed. It doesn’t matter. They can just flat out shoot the rock.
6.) Vince Carter
At 157 years old Vince Carter will still be jumping out of the gym. He has lost a little bit (a very little bit) of explosion, but there is still no one who comes close to Vince Carter when it comes to dunking a basketball in-game. VC is the most electrifying player I have ever watched and I’ve been watching since a guy named Michael Jordan was playing. He is the only player that I’ve ever watched who has made me feel what he was doing. When he throws down a windmill, Joe Schmo in the fifth row gets chills. When he jumps over 7 footers the whole world goes crazy. When he stares down a guy who he just dunked on my heart is beating as fast as his. When he does a celebratory And 1 dance the fans can feel that. They feel like they are a part of the game and that’s what the NBA is all about. On top of that he has a sweet stroke from long range. His nickname sums him up perfectly. Half Man Half Amazing.
5.) Joe Johnson
Joe Johnson is a silent assassin. He isn’t going to cross anybody or throw it down in traffic. He isn’t going to wow the crowd with his speed. You’ll never see him partying with A-List celebrities. I’ve never even heard the guy talk. Quite frankly he’s pretty boring. Even his name is boring. He is still one of the most lethal scorers in the league despite his lack of charisma. Johnson has helped lead the once abysmal Atlanta Hawks back to being a perennial playoff team. His consistency and leadership make up for his shortcomings in the entertainment department.
4.) Brandon Roy
From the time Brandon Roy stepped onto a NBA floor, it was evident that he would be a force for years to come. He doesn’t really have any glaring holes in his game. He’s just solid across the board. I personally did not think he would amount to much coming out of Washington, but I was way off base. He made an immediate impact and has been Portland’s go-to-guy from day one. The crazy part is that he is only twenty three years old. It’s scary to think about how good he’ll be when it’s all said and done.
3.) Kevin Durant
Kevin Durant is a lanky swingman who has never seen a shot that he didn‘t like. His skill set is outrageous for his size. There aren’t many guys who have a mismatch night in and night out, but Durant is one of them. He’s too big for 1’s, 2’s, and 3’s to guard. He’s too fast for 4’s and 5’s. The players who are big enough and fast enough simply aren’t good enough. The only problem is that his team is nothing more than a glorified D-League team.
2.) Dwayne Wade
Dwayne Wade is probably the most explosive player in the NBA today. He has a lethal combination of speed and strength. Those two attributes make it just about impossible to stay in front of him. I like to think of D-Wade as the Manny Ramirez of basketball (minus the lackluster effort on defense). Similar to Ramirez, Wade loves the spotlight and he knows how to treat the big moment. His theatrics after sinking one of his patented circus shots are as entertaining as the shots themselves. His swagger along with his skill makes him the ideal franchise player. That is exactly why he’ll be one of the most sought after free agents in the illustrious 2010 class.
1.) Kobe Bryant
No surprise here. It pains me to say it, but Kobe is the best in the business. I am not a Kobe fan by any stretch of the imagination. He shows up his teammates on a regular basis. He is capable of shooting his team out of the game. He cries about every call. I’ve never met him, but he seems like an asshole. That is a part of his persona. There isn’t much grey area with Bryant. Either you love him or you hate him. Whether you like him or not you have to respect what he is capable of. After getting that forth ring last year, I think that he has to be considered one of the top ten players to ever play this game.